The most common questions I receive from clients, readers and people who attend my workshops and retreats have to do with how to get other people to change.
You know, things like:
“Kimberly, how do I get my significant other to be more ________?”
“How do I make my child listen?”
My neighbor is driving me crazy. S/he is ___________ and it makes me _______________. Isn’t this unreasonable? How can I make her/him see that?”
“My boss/colleague/employee is such a jerk! He/she _________ and ____________ until I have to ____________ just to get through the day. I can’t take it anymore! What should I do to get through to him/her?”
“My mother/father keeps _______________. How can I make her/him stop?”
But of course, those questions (which I also fall into asking from time to time) are all based on an inaccurate assumption, which is that your happiness and fulfillment lie in what someone else is doing or not doing.
In fact, the only thing that ever needs to change in order for you to live the life your soul desires is your own consciousness.
Mystics, shamans, radical rabbis, medicine women, monks, druids and priestesses have been saying it forever:
Change your consciousness; change your life.
But how do you DO that?
Ah, here’s where we see the importance of asking the right question.
Because DO-ing is far less important than the BE-ingness out of which the doing arises.
It’s not about DO-ing the right thing to MAKE someone else behave differently.
It’s about BE-ing who we want to BE and then playing along with the music of what happens.
In other words, you must first connect with your Source, the Essence of All that Is, God, the Divine Wisdom that lives in you, and BE that, just for a moment.
When you remember who you are in this way, you realize that all the external things you thought you needed to change (including those maddening behaviors of other people) are irrelevant.
Because all of your external experiences are only manifestations of your inner state of being.
And who you are in any given moment changes everything.
So if you really want someone else to change, start instead by asking yourself questions like these:
“Who do I want to BE? And what would THAT PERSON do, right now?”
When you ask these questions, you begin to see new possibilities.
You start re-examining your old assumptions (including your assumptions about the people in your life).
And here’s the freaky thing:
When you do that, the other people start changing.
Far out, huh?
You don’t have to take my word for this.
Just play around with it and watch what happens.
It’s like magic!
And speaking of magic, if you’d like to play around with consciousness-shifting concepts like these while communing with ancient landscapes, visiting sacred sites, drinking in poetry and music, breathing in the sea and sky of Ireland’s wild west with me and some of my Irish friends, then consider joining us a year from now, (September 10-17, 2016) for the next Irish Immersion Experience!
The final Early Bird Special (get $200 off a Private Room OR a free Updated Cottage Upgrade) ends on October 31st. The Early Bird special isn’t listed on the website—just mention it when you register and let me know which option you’d like.
Love and Blessings,